1 “I think getting drunk is the key to flying comfortably.” – Amanda Peet
2 “A little bit of beer is divine medicine.” –Paracelsus, Greek physician
3 Don’t worry, BEER happy!
4 “Trust me: You can dance — Alcohol.” — Unknown
5 Ah, beer. The cause of and the solution to all of life’s problems. – Homer Simpson
6 Milk is for babies. When you grow up you have to drink beer. – Arnold Schwarzenegger
7 Whoever drinks beer, he is quick to sleep; whoever sleeps long, does not sin; whoever does not sin, enters Heaven! Thus, let us drink beer! — Martin Luther
8 Whoever invented beer is a wise man – Plato.
9 “Beer, it’s the best damn drink in the world.” – Jack Nicholson
10 “Life is too short to drink cheap beer.” – Anon
11 Next to music beer was best. — Carson McCullers
12 “I’m a beer man. I tried to drink whiskey and Scotch, but I don’t get it. It smells like a girl who didn’t shower and just splashed a lot of perfume on.” – Mads Mikkelsen
13 “A psychologist once said that we know little about the conscience – except that it is soluble in alcohol.” – Thomas Blackburn
14 Love is ALE we need.
15 24 hours in a day, 24 beers in a case. Coincidence?” – Stephen Wright
16 Beer makes you feel the way you ought to feel without beer. – Henry Lawson
17 I’m an old-fashioned guy… I want to be an old man with a beer belly sitting on a porch, looking at a lake or something. – Johnny Depp
18 Give my people plenty of beer, good beer, and cheap beer, and you will have no revolution among them. – Queen Victoria
19 I would kill everyone in the room just for one drop of just a drop of quality beer – Homer Simpson.
20 “You can’t be a real country unless you have a beer and an airline – it helps if you have some kind of football team, or some nuclear weapons, but in the very least you need a beer.” – Frank Zappa
21 “Not all chemicals are bad. Without chemicals such as hydrogen and oxygen, there would be no way to make water, a vital ingredient in beer.” – Dave Barry
22 I am a firm believer in the people. If given the truth, they can be depended upon to meet any national crisis. The great point is to bring them the real facts, and beer. – Abe Lincoln
23 “Important people are much more interesting when they are drunk and seem much more like human beings. “ – Marilyn Monroe, My Story
24 “All right, brain, I don’t like you and you don’t like me – so let’s just do this and I’ll get back to killing you with beer.” – Homer Simpson
25 I give into beer pressure.
26 “I followed my heart & It led me to ALCOHOL.” — Unknown
27 There is nothing in the world like the first taste of beer. – John Steinbeck
28 Beauty is in the eye of the beer holder. – Kinky Friedman
29 Give me a woman who loves beer and I will conquer the world.— Wilhelm II
30 Since everybody has to believe in something, I believe I’ll get another drink – W.C. Fields.
31 “In a study, scientists report that drinking beer can be good for the liver. I’m sorry, did I say ‘scientists’? I meant Irish people.” – Tina Fey – Comedian and writer
32 “Work is the curse of the drinking classes.” Oscar Wilde
33 Beer, if drunk in moderation, softens the temper, cheers the spirit, and promotes health. — Thomas Jefferson, US president & Francophile
34 “It takes only one drink to get me drunk. The trouble is, I can’t remember if it’s the thirteenth or the fourteenth. “ – George Burns
35 “Always do sober what you said you’d do drunk. That will teach you to keep your mouth shut.” – Ernest Hemmingway
36 It’s beer o’clock somewhere!
37 “A man’s true character comes out when he’s drunk.” – Charlie Chaplin
38 Well, I never met a beer I didn’t drink. And down it goes. – Norm Peterson,
39 Some people wanted champagne and caviar when they should have had beer and hot dogs. – Dwight D. Eisenhower
40 Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. Teach him how to fish, and he will sit in a boat and drink beer all day.— George Carlin
41 An intelligent man is sometimes forced to drink in order to spend time with fools – Earnest Hemingway.
42 “I’ve only been in love with a beer bottle and a mirror.” – Sid Vicious – Punk Rocker
43 “What care I how time advances, I am drinking ale today.” – Edgar Allan Poe
44 “stay with the beer. beer is continuous blood. a continuous lover”. — Charles Bukowski, poet, novelist & enemy of conventional punctuation
45 “It’s useless to hold a person to anything he says while he’s in love, drunk, or running for office. “ – Shirley MacLaine
46 “Always remember that I have taken more out of alcohol than alcohol has taken out of me.” – Winston Churchill
47 I am silently judging your beer selection!
48 “Step Aside COFFEE This is a Job for ALCOHOL” — Unknown
49 It takes beer to make a thirst worthwhile. – German saying
50 They who drink beer will think beer. – Washington Irving
51 A drunk was in front of a judge. The judge says “You’ve been brought here for drinking.” The drunk says “Okay, let’s get started.— Henny Youngman
52 God made years and dough, and loves fermentation just as he loves vegetation – Ralph Waldo Emerson.
53 Thoughts on the matter: “Most people hate the taste of beer—to begin with. It is, however, a prejudice.” – Winston Churchhill – British Prime Minister
54 “Good people drink good beer.” – Hunter S Thompson
55 We old folks have to find our cushions and pillows in our tankards. Strong beer is the milk of the old. — Martin Luther, Protestant reformer & another dead guy
56 “I’m only here for the beer.” – Ind Coope Brewery
57 “I said no to alcohol, but it just doesn’t listen.” — Unknown
58 Do you know what rhymes with Friday? Beer.
59 “I’ve never been drunk, but often I’ve been over served.” ― George Gobel
60 Beer needs baseball, and baseball needs beer—it has always been thus. -Peter Richmond
61 I definitely feel closer to the feminine side of the human being than I do the male – or the American idea of what a male is supposed to be. Just watch a beer commercial and you’ll see what I mean. – Kurt Cobain
62 You can only drink 30 or 40 glasses of beer a day, no matter how rich you are. – Adolphus Busch
63 A quart of ale is enough meal for a King – Tufail Mehraj.
64 Thoughts on the matter: “There is no such thing as a bad beer. It’s that some taste better than others.” – Bill Carter – Writer, documentary maker
65 “I work until beer o’clock.” Stephen King
66 Beer’s intellectual. What a shame so many idiots drink it. — Ray Bradbury, novelist & creepy visionary
67 “You can’t drink all day if you don’t start in the morning.” – Founders Brewing, Breakfast Stout
68 “Beer has food value, but food has no beer value.”
69 I tried running. Gave it up. I kept spilling my beer.
70 “Always buy a bigger bottle than you think You’ll need. Better to be safe than sober.” — Unknown
71 Beer will get you through time of no money better than money will get you through times of no beer. – Freddie Freak
72 It feels like I can wrap up the day with a glass of beer. – Hyun Bin
73 I envy people who drink. At least they have something to blame everything on. — Oscar Levant
74 A non-drinker is a weak person, who succumbs to the who yields to the lure of denying himself pleasure.
75 “Beer is proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy.” – Benjamin Franklin – Inventor, Diplomat, Publisher and Founding Father
76 “I drink because I work, I work so I can drink.” — Unknown
77 I’m gaining weight the right way: I’m drinking beer. — Johnny Damon, former pro ballplayer & traitor
78 “Beer. Now there’s a temporary solution.” – Dan Castellaneta
79 “Beer is a wholesome liquor…it abounds with nourishment” – Dr. Benjamin Rush
80 Life is BREW-tiful!
81 “Alcohol does not make you fat, it makes you lean: against tables, chairs, walls, floors and ugly people.” — Unknown
82 Give a man a beer, waste an hour. Teach a man to brew, and waste a lifetime! – Bill Owen
83 Life, alas, is very drear. Up with the glass! Down with the beer! – Louis Untermeyer
84 Women are like beer, they look and smell good, and you would step over your mother just to get one – Homer Simpson.
85 “stay with the beer. beer is continuous blood. a continuous lover.” – Charles Bukowski – Author, drinker
86 “ I am not addicted to beer… It’s addicted to me.” Cyanide & Happiness
87 A meal of bread, cheese, and beer constitutes the perfect food. — Queen Elizabeth I
88 “To me ‘Drink responsibly’ means don’t spill it.” — Unknown
89 “Beer will always have a definite role in the diet of an individual and can be considered a cog in the wheel of nutritional foods.” -Bruce Carlton
90 “Beer: So much more than just a breakfast drink.” -Whitstran Brewery sign
91 The best beer in the world is the open bottle in your hand.
92 “In wine there is wisdom, in beer there is Freedom, in water there is bacteria.” — Unknown
93 Beer is the Danish national drink, and the Danish national weakness is another beer. – Clementine Paddleford
94 In heaven there is no beer. That’s why we drink ours here.— Frank Yankovic
95 Apparently beer contains the hormones of a woman, once you drink enough you can neither drive nor shut up – Tufail Mehraj.
96 “A man who lies about beer makes enemies.” – Stephen King – Author
97 “If you ever reach total enlightenment while drinking beer, I bet it makes beer shoot out your nose.” – Jack Handey
98 “Women should put a picture of their missing husbands on beer cans.” – Steven Wright
99 “Brewers enjoy working to make beer as much as drinking beer instead of working.” -Harold Rudolph
100 Pizza alone won’t fill the emptiness inside you, you’ll also need a beer!
101 “War and drink are the two things man is never too poor to buy.”- William Faulkner
102 Englishmen are like their own beer: Frothy on top, dregs on the bottom, the middle excellent. – Voltaire
103 Nothing ever tasted better than a cold beer on a beautiful afternoon with nothing to look forward to than more of the same. – Hugh Hood
104 “Alcohol has been a social lubricant for thousands of years. What do you think, you’re going to sit here tonight and reinvent the wheel?” – Roger Swanson, Roger Dodger
105 “Fermentation may have been a greater discovery than fire.” – David Rains Wallace
106 I only drink beer on days that end with “Y”
107 “Drink today, and drown all sorrow; you shall perhaps not do tomorrow.” -John Fletcher
108 I went on a diet, swore off drinking and heavy eating, and in fourteen days I lost two weeks. – Joe E. Lewis
109 Money can’t buy happiness—but it can buy beer. — Gary Reilly
110 “Beer is for breakfast around here, drink or be gone.” – Doug Coughlin, Cocktail
111 “Bring us a pitcher of beer every seven minutes until somebody passes out. And then bring one every ten minutes.” – Thornton Melon, Back To School
112 “God made pot. Man made beer. Who do you trust?” -Restroom in The Irish Times, Washington DC
113 I like my water with barley and hops!
114 “I only take a drink on two occasions – when I’m thirsty and when I’m not.” – Brendan Behan
115 Beer is the center of everything. Everything revolves around beer. When you drink beer, everything revolves. Therefore beer is the center of everything. – University of Waterloo Engineers
116 Beer … a high and mighty liquor. — Julius Caesar
117 “I want to sit under a linden tree with nothing more important to worry about but the temperature of the beer. If there is anything more important.” – Sam Dodsworth, Dodsworth
118 “I drink to make other people interesting.” -George Jean Nathan
119 Drink beer like it’s your day job!
120 “Don’t cry over spilled milk…it could have been beer!” — Unknown
121 Why is American beer served cold? So you can tell it from urine. – David Moulton
122 “He that drinks fast, pays slow.” — Benjamin Franklin
123 “The only way Ralph would remember our anniversary is if there was a beer named June 2nd.” – Agnes, Wandavision
124 “From man’s sweat and God’s love, beer came into the world.” – St. Arnulf of Metz
125 “If you ever reach total enlightenment while drinking beer, I bet it makes beer shoot out your nose.” -Deep Thought, Jack Handy
126 Ashes to ashes, dust to dust. When life’s a bitch, beer is a must!
127 “Let’s have a beer together, you can open it and I will drink it.” — Unknown
128 The problem with the world is that everyone is a few drinks behind. – Humphrey Bogart
129 “I have often regretted what I have eaten, but never what I have drunk.”- Otto von Bismarck
130 “It was a natural as eating and to me as necessary, and I would not have thought of eating a meal without drinking beer”- Ernest Hemingway
131 Beer is not the answer. Beer is the question. “Yes” is the answer!
132 “Beer doesn’t have many vitamins. That’s why you need to drink lots of it.” — Unknown
133 You’re not drunk if you can lie on the floor without holding on. – Dean Martin
134 Many battles have been fought and won by soldiers nourished on beer.— Frederick the Great
135 “A drunk tongue is an honest one in my opinion. “ – Adele
136 “Let us drink for the replenishment of our strength, not for our sorrow” -Cicero
137 “Act single, see double, drink triple.” — Unknown
138 Great beer bellies are made, not born. – Unknown
139 There cannot be good living where there is not good drinking.— Benjamin Franklin
140 “Alcohol gives you infinite patience for stupidity.” – Sammy Davis, Jr.
141 “Reality is an illusion caused by a lack of good beer.”
142 “A party without alcohol is just a meeting.” — Unknown
143 When I read about the evils of drinking, I gave up reading. – Henny Youngman
144 Not one man in a beer commercial has a beerbelly.— Rita Rudner
145 “A man who exposes himself when he is intoxicated, has not the art of getting drunk.” – Samuel Johnson
146 “There is more to life than beer alone, but beer makes those other things even better.” – Stephen Morris
147 “Save the earth, it’s the only planet with beer.” — Unknown
148 It’s a fair wind that blew men to ale. – Washington Irving
149 Let no man thirst for good beer. – Samuel Adams
150 “May you always have love in your heart and beer in your belly.” — Unknown